I have to admit it that when I heard Donald Trump at one of his rallies the other day speak of how physically ‘well-endowed’ golf legend Arnold Palmer was, I cringed. Why in the world, I asked myself, with the election seemingly going his way at this late date, why in the world would he say such a thing? 

The truth is, Donald Trump is much more than the king of locker-room speak; he is the unadulterated personification of maleness. Donald Trump is Errol Flynn rescuing Olivia de Havilland, Clark Gable telling Vivien Leigh he doesn’t give a damn, John Wayne kissing Maureen O’Hara in a doorway, and Burt Reynolds posing nude in Cosmopolitan Magazine. Donald Trump is the guy who has a piece of his ear shot off and then, covered in blood, gets up from the stage floor with raised right fist in the air, and bellows: “Fight! Fight! Fight!” 

Donald Trump is famous, recognizable, and running for president. He is bigger than life. Don’t be surprised if he sometimes seems crude, because Donald Trump is pure yang. Donald Trump is pure yang and, as Jake and Elwood would put it, he is here “on a mission from God.”

To anyone with common sense, it is obvious that our world is painfully out of whack. We have men competing in women’s sports, pronoun reeducation, transgender bathrooms, and high school boys showering in girls’ locker rooms. Nowadays, it seems as though people aren’t sure how many sexes there are. Call me brash, but I know the answer. There are only two sexes: male and female. And I know the difference too.

Rush Limbaugh, of blessed memory, often warned that America (and the world) is getting more and more chickified. I couldn’t agree more. I look at our world and I see a population dangerously dominated by unadulterated yin -- too much female principle. Make no mistake our world is out of balance.

This, in my opinion, is why Donald Trump has come upon the world scene. He has come to help our planet correct itself and find the equal balance between male and female. In order for that to happen the world’s feminine side -- a side overly weighted down right now (i.e. we must have a woman president!) -- needs to be awakened to the truth. There needs to be a cosmic shifting of sorts and Donald Trump, the man who is pure yang, is just the one to bring it about.

So the next time Donald Trump says something that makes you cringe, ask yourself the following question: Would I prefer a president who talks locker-room talk, or one who thinks boys are welcome in the girls locker room?

Image: AT via Magic Studio