Business is war.  Don’t believe me?  Then ask Ray Kroc.  Ray was the kind of businessman that if he saw his competitors drowning, he would grab a hose and finish the job.

Ray Kroc used the weakness of the McDonald brothers to his own advantage, and now Mac’s Arches adorn every freeway exit in America.

But unfortunately for McDonald’s, the founder is long gone, and woke morons occupy its C suite. And McDonald’s isn’t the only one.

In case you haven’t noticed, wokeness is weakness. Woke is riddled with crippling anxiety.  Woke is a temper tantrum.  Woke is immaturity.  And judging by the sheer number of “I’m smarter than you” glasses frames, woke is nearsighted as well.

If I were the CEO of American Airlines I would be sending women with babies out on United Airlines flights with pretend women flight attendants, for the express purpose of getting thrown off flights for “misgendering”… thus creating bad woke visuals for United.

If I were the governor of Indiana I would insert moles into the Chicago Teachers Union to make all sorts of high-dollar ridiculous demands (like electric school buses)… Then wait for dissatisfied Illinois taxpayers and businesses to populate my state.

If I owned a brewery, I would strongly encourage my competitors to put the picture of a man in a dress on their cans

If I were the RNC, I would strongly encourage the DNC to stick with the old demented dude who sniffs little girls’ hair.  I would put up billboards with a big picture of the trans nonbinary luggage stealing pup handler forner assistant nuclear waste director that said “You can be just like Sam if you Vote Democrat.”

If I were in college today, I would make sure that I was the only one actually learning anything.  I would trigger the woke every chance I got… I would make sure my woke competitors were more concerned with going to a protest than going to class.

I would shame them for not being like Saint Greta of Klimätt and not going to the other side of the world to complain about not being in skööl.

I would point out that they are privileged for staying in class while marginalized, indigenous fake women of color were being oppressed.  I would make sure they spent their class time throwing tantrums if they did show up.

If I were a Christian cake decorator, I would agree to decorate their gay wedding cake… with the grossest, most overly sweet, buttercream ever whipped… on the driest, most tasteless cake ever baked… (sorry, no refunds).  Give me the chance to ruin your special day. I assure you, I’m up to the task!

I once gained a management position in an unlikely place.  Skinny men are very much the exception in Lane Bryant’s management.  I got the position because my competitor was constantly playing victim, and constantly crying.  Her crying was so frequent that the other girls found it annoying… so I’d encourage her tears.

And she ultimately cried me an additional $400 a week in my paycheck! 

It’s the art of war.

If your competition has crippling anxiety, make them anxious!  If they are upset about institutional racism, make the think it’s everywhere!  If they are overly concerned about the environment, make them more concerned… shame them into walking everywhere, and eating only wheat grass. 

If your job competition is out protesting, they won’t be in job interviews… you win!

If you live in Chicago and the teachers union is making stupid demands… let them!  Hell, encourage it!  The laws of thermodynamics come into play… they will burn out fast if encouraged to flame up too much.

The only way to get rid of a union in Illinois is to let it destroy itself.  The CTU is doing that… don’t interrupt them. (“But my taxes are going up.”  Yes, and so are everyone else’s.)

Opportunities that are the result of self-induced weakness in the competition have historically been quite rare. 

History would have been quite different if Napoleon had fallen to pieces because someone didn’t use his pronouns, if the Spartan 300 hadn’t been able to leave the house because of anxiety, or if Jesus’ disciples had decided that everything was racist. 

Had John D. Rockefeller been woke, we never would’ve heard of Standard Oil.  If Sam Walton had been fighting for a $20 per hour minimum wage…no Walmarts would exist.

If you aren’t woke, woke is your golden opportunity!  The woke are drowning themselves in self-pity… be like Ray Kroc and grab a hose!

Image: AT via Magic Studio