In a normal year, a normal environment, a normal presidency...

Joe Biden would accept the judgment of Father Time, if not Uncle Sam as per polling.  He would gracefully withdraw, retire early, wave good-bye (possibly even in the correct direction), and nobody would gainsay his decision or its timing.

He could mold his legacy, write his own encyclopedia entries, define his presidency...and even his “career.”

To do so now, at this point in the election cycle, would calm the political waters that now roil — no waves, no electoral vortex, no tsunami of political crises.  The Democrats could have an exciting “born again” campaign, grabbing positive headlines.  A new administration, a fresh campaign, down-ballot candidates breathing easier, maybe smiling for the first time in months.

The Trump juggernaut would be threatened, possibly derailed.

Whatever pretext Joe would grab as an excuse to retire — his mental “health,” obviously; Hunter’s problems; the Biden Sniffles; terminal jetlag — he actually could look like a statesman for the first time in his interminable career.

America could awake from its latest “long national nightmare.”  Game, set, match.  Something new in the nation’s political narratives, but c’mon, man — it happens.

A plausible scenario, even myriad blessings in disguise.  Except...it would mean that Kamala Harris would be president.

An average politician, even an average grifting Nobody from the political proletariat, a latter-day Millard Fillmore or Chester A. Arthur, would be accepted, perhaps welcomed.  However, Kamala Harris inspires what were once the administration’s putative brands, unity and equity.  That is — men, women, white, black, minorities, all classes, all income levels, actually can agree on something.  Harris is such a first-class, blue-ribbon, no-doubt dunce, and virtually nobody can imagine her as president.  Or want her as president, even as a caretaker.  Or would not immediately wish for a return of the First Vegetable, Joe Biden.

Her toxicity is covered up by the P.C. Vaccine.  Her “identities” are the elephants (or donkeys) in the room, so her blindingly obvious uselessness must not be mentioned.

The erstwhile Border Czarina and (as ballyhooed on her government website) champion of the freedom to drink clean water could not do worse than her previous electoral foray, when she withdrew as a candidate after polling in the low single digits in her own state’s presidential primary in 2020.  That water was tested.

And she could not do worse than that.

...actually, yes, she could.  Without a whiff of substance or gravitas or intelligence, Harris — as much as Old Joe himself — is responsible for this unprecedented and dangerous mess in which America finds itself.  Her immediate disqualification?  She has been as close to the president as anybody not named Jill — and has been certifying his brilliance and competency.  Her brilliance and competency, already widely dismissed, would be further exposed.

Withal, as Spiro Agnew was for Nixon until he resigned as Vice President, Harris is a walking insurance policy for Joe Biden.

Crisis upon crisis, if America could look past the nightmare that would be a Harris presidency, no matter how brief it would be, the Democrats’ “bench” is absurdly thin.  Biden’s fingernails will continue to keep him hanging on, but not indefinitely; Kamala will continue her annoying cackle; and America will continue crying.

Rick Marschall is a former political cartoonist and frequent commentator.  His 75th book, The Most Interesting American, about Theodore Roosevelt, recently was published by Post Hill Press.  His weekly blog is MondayMinistry.com/blog.

Image: Mobilus In Mobili via Wikimedia Commons, CC BY-SA 4.0 (cropped).