I have never aspired to serve in the US Congress, except in those moments when engaging in insider trading seemed financially rewarding; illegal for us ordinary Americans (ask Martha Stewart), but not for Congress. After watching the latest clown show that was Merrick Garland's appearance before Congress, I know how I would have addressed him had I been on that committee:

Mr. Garland. We have been subjected to many of your appearances before this committee. You have proven yourself to be remarkably consistent.

I have come to the conclusion that you have studied long and hard at the Hillary Clinton/ Adam Schiff School of Public Integrity, and you have graduated Summa Cum Laude.  For those of you on the other side of the aisle, this means "with highest honors."

You come before this committee to testify and answer questions about your management of the Department of Justice. When pressed on even the most obvious malfeasance, you tap dance, pass the buck, feign ignorance, dissemble, and lie. I have no intention of asking you any further questions because it is a waste of my time and that of this committee. So here is my take on you and your dreadful performance at the Department of Justice.

I have no doubt that when you return to the Department after another stellar performance here in Congress, you smirk and take high fives from your colleagues: 'Boy did I put another one over on those rubes in Congress!' But you didn't. To paraphrase a line in an F. Scott Fitzgerald story, you are like a cut glass bowl, hollow and we can see right through you.

In the 1970s former Attorney General, John Mitchell, was convicted and went to prison. Yet what Mitchell did was no worse than the perversions of justice over which you have presided.

You use the FBI to attack parents who object to policies of school boards and pretend you didn't know or that it was something else. You refuse to prosecute those who were illegally demonstrating in front of the houses of Supreme Court Justices, falsely claiming that this decision is solely up to federal marshals; all because you sympathize with the demonstrators. You deliberately obstruct justice by slow walking a slam-dunk prosecution of Hunter Biden by allowing the statute of limitations to run on his most serious tax offenses. Who was prosecuted for the destruction of federal buildings during the Floyd riots? Now your Department of Justice is targeting Elon Musk, who has been so instrumental in exposing the nefarious operations of the Democrats. Just a coincidence, I suppose.

But you can rest assured that you will never be investigated or charged with anything. Barack Obama brought to the Justice Department "the Chicago way," where political enemies are punished and friends like you receive the perennial "get out of jail free" card. It doesn't matter in what you have engaged as long as you have been loyal. Heaven help any opposition, because they will need it.

Your lies, your obstructions of justice will never be prosecuted, and you know it. You know you have the same sort of immunity had by the likes of James Clapper, John Brennan, James Comey, Hillary Clinton, Tony Fauci, and Alejandro Mayorkas, to name only a few of many. After all, what are little things like the Constitution, oaths, the rule of law, and equal justice, when there are political scores to settle, power to be consolidated, and influential Democrat supporters and players to be protected?

You have crassly squandered whatever semblance of a good reputation that you may have had when you left the federal bench. Now you will be forever remembered as just another bitter, political hack, instrumental in the degradation of America's system of justice.

Not a day goes by when I don't thank God and the then-majority in the Senate for keeping someone with your character off the Supreme Court. If you had any sense of decency or honor, you would resign. But of course, you have neither. So, the country will continue to endure the chronic miscarriage of justice endemic in any banana republic. Congress will simply waste more time listening to you as you pretend to be an effective and responsible public servant. I cede the rest of my time.

If only a congressman would be so direct and candid instead engaging in phony courtesy, addressed to someone so undeserving. I have never met a person on the political left who lacked an abundance of self-esteem. Merrick Garland, being a Democrat and evidently incapable of any self-reflection or shame, would ignore my statement. He would still celebrate his performance upon returning to the Department of Justice, and I would be branded by our worthless press corps as just another MAGA extremist hater.