Translating Liberalspeak
Liberals often talk about things but actually mean other things. For example, “trans rights” really means elevating the trans agenda to unearned prominence and insisting people pay attention. It is not about giving trans people “rights.” They have the same rights everyone else has. They just want more. “Trans rights” also means shoveling cartloads of money into trans causes.
Here are some other translations we would be wise to memorize so that we may behave accordingly when some virtue-signaling liberal weenie throws them at us:
- Gay rights: I need you to pay attention to my bedroom habits because there is nothing else in my life that has meaning except whom I dally with in the bedroom.
- Drag Queen Story Hour: I am going to dress up like a woman even though I am obese and ugly. I will make my face up like a Halloween clown so that I cease looking like a human being and start looking like Bozo the Clown on special mushrooms. Then I will prance around a stage with artificial boobs, wiggle my behind in 5-year-olds’ faces, lisp and dance suggestively, displaying replicas of my privates. I’ll graduate to the real thing soon enough. Maybe I’ll read something to the kids. If I do, it will be a story about oral sex between two young men, or one young man and an older man. Or two women, or….
- Diversity is our strength: Even though there is no evidence whatsoever that diversity is anybody’s strength, let alone an entire country’s strength, I will speak about diversity in glowing terms in order to promote preferential treatment for POC (people of color). By “diversity,” I actually mean special treatment for POC and the marginalization of white people.
- The Green Agenda will stop global warming and climate change: We insist that every unusual weather event, hot or cold, still or windy, dry or moist, water levels up or down, ice melting or accreting, will be attributed to “climate change.” In addition, we insist that gas stoves, regular toilets, gasoline-powered vehicles, thermostats, farting, and meat-eating pollute the planet . We do this to control other human beings and to make them like the poorer countries on the planet because, well, reasons.
- Critical race theory: White people are responsible for every evil on the planet including hangnails and zits. The country was actually built by slaves. America is a deeply racist country and we will spend our lives grifting off white people’s collective guilt. If instilling guilt won’t work, we will simply game the system for huge amounts of reparations using the threat of violence to get it. We have already set up several organizations to do just that. We know America isn’t really systemically racist but don’t tell POC that, otherwise we may have to use legitimate legislative moves (or, heaven forbid, we might have to work) to amass funding and personal wealth.
- Gun control: We don’t really want to control guns unless we’re the ones who control them. We want it to be illegal, punishable by death, for Americans to own firearms for protection or hunting or for other reasons. We want the government (under Marxist control) to be able to confiscate all personally-owned firearms for when we confiscate all individual wealth and private property. We can’t do that if people can defend home and hearth with firearms. We vow to classify every murder as avoidable if only guns had been illegal. We will always use the term “assault weapons” even to refer to pistols and bows and arrows.
- Equity: Because America is systemically racist, we want POC to have preferential treatment in hiring, renting, purchasing, education and every other facet of life. We publicly say that we want equal outcomes but what we really want is for white people to disappear by any means necessary so we can get all the goodies they now have. We want white people to go away but we can’t say that out loud so we’ll just say we want everyone to be equal in what they have or own or how they succeed. That sounds better. Also, if white people deny they are racist, we will say that’s proof they are.
There are many more such liberalspeak terms and ideas, but you get the idea. A good rule of thumb is that when a liberal opines, listen politely, smile ruefully, give a mild disappointed head shake and say, “If you say so,” then go elsewhere where intelligent discourse prevails. Never, never, ever, try to reason with a liberal; they are not into reason and they are not listening to you speak. For your own amusement, count the seconds before a liberal lapses into ad hominem attacks. Then look at your watch and say, “That didn’t take long.” Then walk away.
Really. Walk away.
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