Every year, dictionary companies publicly release a list of new words added to their pages.  Somehow, they have omitted the inclusion of "Faucian," as in "Faucian bargain."  This is not to be confused with a "Faustian bargain," which is basically a "deal with the devil" that would provide short-term benefits but long-term tragedy or destruction for the dealmaker.  On the other hand, a "Faucian bargain" involves any decision or ploy made to benefit the little conman, Anthony Fauci.

The concept was first discussed in the book Faucian Bargain. The Most Powerful and Dangerous Bureaucrat in American History by Steve Deace and Todd Erzen, published in 2021 by Post Hill Press.  The only review listed on the Amazon website, though a five-star, was obviously insufficient to propel the word into the world of Merriam-Webster or the popular lexicon.  I will, therefore, in the interest of wordsmiths everywhere, submit the following:

Faucian: Relating to a decision or agreement made to benefit Dr. Anthony Fauci.  Such decision or deal need not be based on fact or honesty.  It requires only that it be to the benefit, be it reputational or preferably financial,  of the diminutive doctor.  2. Relating to a deal or agreement to augment Dr. Fauci's obvious low stature by increasing his delusionally high self-regard.

I had thought that we had seen the last of the diminutive doctor, but an article on the Fox News website by Newt Gingrich suggests otherwise, while affirming the "Faucian" definition.  Newt asserts that we are living in the midst of the largest scandal in U.S. history regarding Fauci's dealings with the Wuhan lab and the Chinese government.  Everything involved in this scandal is "Faucian."  The COVID-19 pandemic elevated Fauci to household word status and doubled his net worth to $12 million during the last three years.  His financial success differs from the result of most of the rest of us as we have watched our IRAs decline in value.  The now-famous flimflammer just won't go away.

An acronym with which we are all familiar is CYA.  Fauci's A is so heavily Ced with multiple layers of CNN and MSNBC propaganda that it is questionable how he carries out his daily personal functions.

Let's hope there is a large portion of Faustian in the Faucian bargain.  That all his lies and deceptions will come raining down on him is a delightful prospect.

Bill Hansmann is a dentist and dental educator with over fifty years in the profession.  He continues to teach and write political blogs and semi-mediocre novels while living with his wife and cats in Florida.

Image: Pixabay.