I collect Bidenisms.  A "Bidenism" is any dumb thing Joe Biden says.  It can be a mispronunciation, malapropism, factual misstatement, stutter, or plain lie.

I have around 1,000 Bidenisms in my collection.  I have already self-published one book with over 400 Bidenisms and have three more in various stages of completion, all from 2021.  If anyone knows Bidenisms, it is I.

For the readers' edification and entertainment, I now present my list of the Top 100 79 Bidenisms of All Time.  This list wasn't easy!  I had a Casanova problem.  Just as Casanova's problem was too many women and not enough time, my problem is too many Bidenisms and not enough word count.  I'd wanted to reach 100 Bidenisms, but I ran out of room.

I'll not be able here to state the date or source of these Bidenisms, but believe me: I can and will be happy to do so on request.

Here goes!

1. "Everywhere I been hearing all around the country. You're trying your BREAST, but it never FEELS like enough."

A VERY COMMON COMPLAINT, indeed!

2. "...kinds of things that have to be done, um, you know, there's a, ah, during World War, Two, uh, you know, what Roosevelt came up with a thing, uh, you know, that was, uh, totally different than a, than the, the ah, he called it, ah, you know, the World War II, he had the war, the the War Production Board."
3. "I am a gaffe machine."
4. "Ahh, successful dump. I dropped everything at the dump; it all worked out, and by the way, I got a second load, guys; anyone who wants to help me unload..."
5. , "The pandemic is that the president has no INTERCOURSE whatsoever with the rest of the country — uh, the world."
6. "We choose truth over facts!"
7. "3-letter word: 'Jobs.' J - O - B - S, jobs"
8. "You're you're a lying dog-faced pony soldier. "
9. "If I'm your president, I'm gonna fight like hell to see your strength goes. I promise."
10. "I moved a little steel town."
11. "HARRIS / BIDEN Administration"
12. "I don't count drunk driving as a felony."
13. "Let's clap for that, you stupid blackguards!" (or: "bastards")
14. "It's a right, for people to have badakathcare."
15. "You know, the r-rapidly rising, ah, ahm, in with, ah, with ah, I don't know, with ah – "
16. "I'M GOING TO BEAT JOE BIDEN."
17. "An independent analysis found that my plan will slash the cost of prescription jugs by 60%."
18. "to create good-paying union jobs, to litter the promise of America"
19. "put millions of citizens on a path to citizenship."
20. Biden accused the president of telling a "ball-faced lie."
21. veterans of "Wool War II."
22. "we can prisclaim the Palmist, what the Palmist ..."
23. Tim Alberta asked Biden about being the oldest president ever, and Biden asked, "What about WINSTON CHURCHILL? "
24. "I'm a Democratic candidate for United States Senate — vote for the other Biden " (said in 2020).
25. "We'll make sure it's not quality; we'll make sure it's only affordable."
26. "Doug Emhoff, uh, Kamala's WIFE,"
27. "Poor kids are just as bright and just as talented as White kids."
28. "my deceased wife is a teacher."
29. "I mean, shylocks who took advantage"
30. "I'm Joe Biden's husband, Joe Biden."
31. "Trump won significantly the last two times,"
32. "that should be a mistermeanor"
33. "He's elected to the next election."
34. "I'll lead an effective strategy to mobilize trunalimunumaprzure."
35. "WHAT'S NOT TO LIKE ABOUT VERMONT...I like Keene (NH) a lot."
36. "Visit Iowal.com slash Ohio!"
37. "I got to the Senate 180 YEARS AGO."
38. "We hold these truths to be self-full evident, all men and women created, by the, go, you know the, you know the thing."
39. the "Obama O'Biden" administration.
40. "...a lifelong Democrat, a proud Democrat, an O'Biden-Bama Democrat."
41. "I'm ready on Day 1 after more than three years in office"
42. "to get our kids to market safely."
43. " ...White supremacists — Nazi sympathizers — carrin' Nazi fags — flags..."
44. "President-Elect Harris took it" (a vaccine)
45. "you're a 1-horse pony."
46. "Everybody, everybody is entritled to be teated with decency and dignity."
47. "And I, aw, wanna share the message directly with the Department of FENCE — Defense staff. "
48. "DoDY China task force"
49. "for the proud Tuskegee — Tuskejee — Airmen"
50. "I don't know what I'm signing huh. "
51. Signing then handing over an Executive Order to VP Harris, Biden said, "Take this to the President."
52. "These are BRILLS that receive votes"
53. "I came to the United States Senate 120 years ago."
54. "these MILLSTONES no more — no longer mark our national mourning — these milestone, I should say"
55. "Our girl goal is to do everything..."
56. "Wildfires burned more than 5,000 acres in the West — an area, roughly the size of the entire State of New Jersey."
57. "I'm either here I'm eager to hear, NIGGER'd here next, by my good friends,..."
58. "Uhh, I wanna make sure we thank, the Secretary, for all he's done."  Once again, Biden had forgotten the name of his own Secretary of DoD.
59. Climate change is a "SEXessential threat to the planet."
60. "development of transformendale and transformidible technologies."
61. "...A moaner of peril... "
62. "it's undeniable, undebilex"
63. "catastrophic failures with titragic results."
64. "manufracturing manufracturing workers"
65. "And Sydney, you're 14 years old."
66. "I, uh, love those barrettes in your hair, man. I tell you what, I look at her; she looks like she's 19 years old, sittin' there with her, like a little lady with her legs crossed."  The LITTLE girl in question is around NINE years old.
67. "Indition, I'd like to point out"...
68. "Mamerica's vaccine supply secured"...
69. "I know this gonna sound PROZAIC, but, I think we're in a contest, not with China per se, but a CONTEXT with autocrats"
70. "urgent need to preserve and reopen humanitarian CARTERS in Syria" (He meant, CORRIDORS.)
71. "By HARASSING the full potential of uh, those who are HARASSING..."
72. "Jake (Sullivan) is my NASA security advisor" (He meant "NATIONAL.")
73. "Visit vaccines dot GUM, dot gov, vaccines dot GUM"
74. "By the way! The SAME STABLE JESUS said the biggest problem we had in the, in the Revolutionary War, is WE DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH AIRPORTS!"
75. "Governor Lujan Grisham of MEXICO." 
76. "This can be among mong most important things you do"
77. "I'm always worried...(cheers)...I'm always worried, when I come back to North Clayana" (North Carolina).
78. "put a million shots in the arms of my first 100 days as President"
79. "We need more MARRIAGE to follow" — Biden wanted to say "MAYORS."

Th-th-th-th-that's all, folks!  I'm out of word count!

Image: Gage Skidmore.

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