"It's good to be the king!" says Mel Brooks's character in the movie The History of the World, Part 1, as he indulges himself with women who cross his path.

These days, "It's really good to be a Democrat!"

If you're a Democrat, you can lie, you can cheat, and you can steal — and nothing happens to you. 

If you're a Democrat, you can "go blackface" — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can censor, you can harass, you can threaten, and you can discriminate — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can demonize, and you can smear — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can falsely accuse people of crimes — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can break the law, be a complete hypocrite, and shove it down people's throats — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can riot, you can loot, you can burn, and you can destroy — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can be violent and assault people — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can sleep with an enemy spy — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can be friends and side with terrorists — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can be a traitor — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can molest, you can rape, and you can be a pedophile — and nothing happens to you.

If you're a Democrat, you can kill people — and nothing happens to you.

And if you're a Democrat, you can help destroy the country — and nothing happens to you.

"It's good to be a Democrat!"

Ayad Rahim is a bookseller and former journalist.

Image: DNC.