The Minneapolis City Council Budget Committee has approved taking $500,000 from the police budget and transferring it to the Office of Violence Prevention to help pay for civilian safety patrols. That sounds reasonable. I mean, what could go wrong if a city suddenly rife with violent crime reallocates half a million dollars from trained, well-equipped police officers to Sierra Club, PETA and Emily’s List members?

A paid consultant with the Office of Violence Prevention told a local television station that he’s been asked to put together a plan to implement the patrols. Jamil Jackson said his proposal would consist of having 100 civilians on patrol in the city, split into five 20-person groups, two on the north side of the city, two on the south side, and one in the downtown area. Jackson noted that “those locations are not finalized yet, those are just proposals,” and added, "This is to hire men to engage in the community and patrol our community but also help by bringing in resources that allow these youth to have something to do other than what they are doing now." Such as looting and burning stores. Perhaps they could look for a job.

Bob Kroll, president of the Minneapolis Police Federation, told the station he would like to know more details about the civilian patrols. A spokesperson for Minneapolis Police Chief Medaria Arradondo said the chief was unavailable for comment and that, in any case, it "would not be appropriate to comment at this time." We can easily guess what that comment might be.

Jackson says the civilian patrols will not be doing any police work and will not be armed. He further stated that they will not be out in the community fighting crime. That is surely comforting to Minneapolis residents. He added, “We are not going to be out there shooting things up. If there is something happening, and a crime is being committed we will call police and report that kind of activity.”

That is truly mind-boggling. The city is going to take a large sum of money from its police force and give it to people who will…summon the police when they see a crime being committed? Yes, let’s hire a group of ill-equipped middlemen to wander around town, pay them with funds that otherwise would’ve gone to the police, and have them call…the police…if they spot a crime. That way, we can reduce efficiency while inflating response times for emergencies. Brilliant! Only progressive government could come up with a plan like that.

“911? I’d like to report an ongoing case of felony stupidity…”