'Adulting' is harder when children are in charge
Even with a vaccine, the coronavirus contagion will not be eradicated anytime soon. For America's aging Baby-Boomer population and those caring for chronically ill or disabled loved ones, that means that brutal choices await us. More than 65 million family caregivers in the U.S., who seem to own the title of "ultimate adulting," now add this wrinkle to their already furrowed brows.
To make it worse, politicians and news media spew forth fear that amps the problem. In our rural community recently, a man with chest pains refused to go to the local hospital due to fear of the virus.
He did not survive his heart attack. It remains unclear if his death is classified as COVID-19-related.
Yet fostering fear isn't enough for today's media. The rank vitriol filling airwaves and headlines leaves so many asking, "Who's telling the truth?"
While "the truth will set you free," it will certainly hack you off first. Truth often hurts, which may be why redefining it seems to have replaced baseball as our national pastime. Maybe substituting the word "reality" might help. After all, reality is a tough companion, but at least it's an honest friend.
Reality states that being in-patient at a medical center cuts you off from family and friends — and many have died and will continue to die alone. Reality also reveals that "in facility" care policies are just that and most likely will not pay workers to care for someone in the home. This may render many long-term policies obsolete.
Another hard reality exposes that masks and a possible vaccine are not good enough. Our immune systems need strengthening, and the way we care for our bodies requires change. Every mainstream media outlet, along with "caring" celebrities, tells us to wear the mask. How many stress the importance of a healthy diet and exercise with every mask plea?
That reality seems a favorite of the media to ignore.
Yet another hard axiom is that we are all born "terminal," and quite a few of us face an unpleasant death. Should scientists miraculously eradicate the virus, a host of other maladies awaits us.
With those truths and realities, how do we live?
We can start by doing healthy things — today. We can stop living in fear and start living. This may involve reducing exposure to news media and their incessant peddling of drama and fear. We can also better evaluate every politician regardless of party. While the GOP talks a good game, all too many functioned with the same skill level as Governor William J. Le Petomane in Blazing Saddles (a movie that now will most likely have a shorter lifespan than Kanye's presidential campaign). While the left holds fast to its agenda, how many more feckless Republicans must we embrace?
Consider the politicians clamoring for their nightly curtain call to look caring or relevant on whichever venue more tightly holds their hands. Try to identify what they offer to help you...today! Not on Election Day, but right now. Repeat the same process with the media.
The hardcore truth is that none of these people will help take care of your loved one. In fact, many of them advocate for the separation that prohibits you from doing so yourself.
Across the country, families work to navigate the disorienting journey of caring for a vulnerable member — a path now horribly complicated by COVID-19. While script-readers, pundits, and politicians tightly cling to their agendas, the agenda of the American family somehow remains drowned out by the clamor. The issues discussed around collective kitchen tables must be elevated to the public discourse. We ceded power over the debate to those reading from teleprompters, not those who read EOBs (Explanation of Benefits to those without health issues or caregiving experience).
When listening to someone bloviate about his plan, or when giving your valuable vote to someone who says, "Follow me," take a moment to compare his experiences with yours.
Does he care for someone? Has he ever hired or fired anyone? List the accomplishments allowing him input into how you structure your life. How does winning a popularity contest or looking beautiful while reading someone else's words compare to fighting with an insurance company to pay for your loved one's treatment?
When treating the sickest among us, America will likely face a lengthy battle of reclaiming some sort of normalcy — yet the policy input of the family caregiver into that treatment remains questionable.
Politicians with a socialism fetish who have never met a payroll can hardly be expected to provide any sense of financial stability to a community, much less a nation. Preening news media adoring themselves in the reflection of the camera offer little to the hard challenges of caring for a disabled or chronically ill loved one. Driving home the needs of American families remains difficult when consumed with "Orange Man Bad" syndrome.
The narrative must be wrested from the self-serving who make millions wearing the moniker "public servant." Pretending and getting paid to serve pales in comparison to the real thing.
Our country is in desperate need of adulting, but being an adult is hard work.
It's harder with children in charge.
Peter Rosenberger hosts the nationally syndicated radio program, Hope for the Caregiver. For more than thirty years, Peter's cared for his wife, Gracie, who lives with severe disabilities. www.hopeforthecaregiver.com