Seven responses to Don Lemon's obnoxious debate question about Trump
Don Lemon asked the following question during the first night of CNN's Democratic debate: "What do you say to those Trump voters who prioritize the economy over the president's bigotry?"
Here are seven possible responses:
1. Yes, I know your 401K is up $75,000 since Trump took office, but he used the phrase "corrupt mess" when speaking of Elijah Cummings's home district in Baltimore. These were mean words. Now, Bernie Sanders said "third world country" when referring to Baltimore, which was much more sensitive and non-racist. This is why you should vote for Bernie and his crazy socialist platform, and stop worrying about stupid things like your own retirement.
2. Sure, you saved $3,500 in taxes last year, but in terms of illegal aliens coming from Mexico and violating the law, Trump said Mexico is "not sending their best." He said, "They're bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people." Unbelievable. You should just let the government keep your $3,500 in tax savings and use it to pay off the student loans of some spoiled Ivy Leaguer who will speak about illegal Mexican border-crossers in kinder, gentler ways.
3. Congratulations: Your small business is really taking off. I hear sales are up 200 percent! Oh, but didn't you hear what Trump tweeted about The Squad? He wrote, "Why don't they go back and help fix the totally broken and crime-infested places from which they came? Then come back and show us how it is done." What nerve — Trump telling his critics to put their money where their mouth is! Better to vote for Elizabeth Warren so she can regulate your small business right out of existence.
4. Great news! I hear your daughter, who just graduated from Lincoln University — America's first degree-granting HBCU — just got a new job with health benefits! Yeah, companies are really hiring right now. And black American unemployment is the lowest in history. Still, I'm not sure if you heard: Trump reportedly referred to Haiti, El Salvador, and African nations as "s---hole countries," or something like that. Maybe your daughter shouldn't take that job after all. Maybe she should just vote for Bernie Sanders and cross her fingers that her college loans will get paid by the government, and that his ludicrous "Medicare for All" will be better than the private health insurance she's getting from her new job.
5. You just bought your first home? That's wonderful! This great economy is really helping Americans make their dreams come true. Well, there is one downside: Trump said he doesn't believe Sharia law should supplant U.S. law, which is Islamophobic. And you know how supporting the Constitution is a real drag on a person's finances. Better to vote Trump out of office and bring in someone like Joe Biden, who will repeal Trump's tax cuts and tighten your wallet, killing your chance to own a home.
6. You just hired five new workers for your landscaping company? Excellent! Sounds as though your business is booming. Oh, but Trump did say he thinks "Islam hates us" in reference to the terrorist attacks by groups like ISIS and al-Qaeda, so you had better fire those new hires. Better to tighten your belt in anticipation of Kamala Harris winning the election, especially when she implements the Green New Deal, which will bankrupt our economy and fundamentally transform our country forever. As everyone knows, it's much more prudent to bankrupt our nation than speak so bluntly about terror groups like ISIS and al-Qaeda.
7. Yes, coal production in places like Pennsylvania has stabilized, which is wonderful! The state's coal industry even generated 17,770 jobs in 2017! But I do have some bad news: when violence started to escalate during a white supremacy rally in Charlottesville, Va., Trump tweeted, "We condemn in the strongest most possible terms this egregious display of hatred, bigotry and violence on many sides. On many sides." He didn't specifically call out the evil of the white nationalists until the next day! Elizabeth Warren would never do such a thing. She'd kill the coal industry with her suffocating environmental regulations, sure, but she'd never wait 12 long hours before specifically calling a white nationalist "evil" after a tragedy like Charlottesville. So forget your terrible, climate-destroying coal-mining job, and get busy voting for the senior senator from Massachusetts, the socialist who's worth millions of dollars and is 1/1,024 American Indian, to boot.
Christopher Paslay is a Philadelphia schoolteacher who writes a blog titled "Philly Teachers For Trump" at https://phillyteachersfortrump.home.blog.
Image: Fuzheado via Wikimedia Commons.