It has been a long and difficult journey, but I have finally found the courage to embrace my cis-malehood.

Encouraged by ever broadening attitudes of inclusion, I am coming out.  I am a red-blooded, full-fledged American cis-male who likes to watch and play sports, drink whiskey and beer, play poker, smoke cigars, enjoy cis-female T&A, even watch boxing once in a while.  I am over the shame that society attempted to impose on me for these preferences.

It’s not clear to me whether my cis-malehood is in my genetic makeup or is a product of my upbringing or a result of something called a “patriarchy.”  But it doesn’t matter.  I am what I am, and I now acknowledge to myself and the world that it is OK.

For a time, some forces in society embarked on an initiative of consciousness-raising in which cis-males like myself were made feel shame for our beliefs.  We were counseled to reject our attitudes and forced to conceal our preferences, sometimes under penalty of law.  This re-education mission stemmed from a conviction that cis-male characteristics were somehow “wrong” or “misguided” and needed “correction” or “adjustment.”  How quaint that view now looks from our 21st-century enlightened position of universal tolerance and acceptance.  Today we recognize this as an injustice and a form of covert oppression.

Let me be clear: there are individuals in society who abuse their cis- (and other-) genderhood and take their impulses into unwarranted actions.  No self-respecting cis-male condones aggression toward others of any gender, and we reject such behaviors.  Self-control is a hallmark of proper conduct in civilized society.  But we also recognize that the actions of a few should not define the rest – an important principle that we apply today, for example, to religion.

Despite the years of anxiety and guilt that I endured under the oppressive genderist regime, I will not ask for reparations for those days past, or seek restitution from the misguided groups and individuals who inflicted those wrongs upon me.

But going forward, I must insist on acceptance of “the way I am” as a simple and inalterable consequence of my being.  Cis-males demand acknowledgement of our condition as valid, equal in every respect to all others.  We expect protection for our status, both under the law and in society generally.  This includes “safe spaces” where we will be free of criticism or verbal assaults, and where speech that we do not wish to hear is not allowed.  We need new safeguards that will enable us to counteract biases, prevent microagression, and punish cis-male hatred.

The ultimate measure of success for cis-males will be our genuine acceptance by society, a new world in which we can speak without fear, move freely, and live consistent with our actuality – in short, having all of the freedoms enjoyed by others.  And for success in this simple expectation, I put my faith in the support of everyone who champions the values of tolerance, inclusion, and diversity.

Rybarczyk is an observer of politics from Connecticut.