Climate change on Jupiter!
Have you heard the news? The big red spot on Jupiter is shrinking! A rare baroclinic wave has shown up for the first time in decades.
This year, Jupiter’s Great Red Spot, which is actually a massive hurricane characteristic of the planet, has shown it’s still shrinking, with its long axis around 150 miles shorter than it was in 2014
Climate change has reached Jupiter! My computer model proves that it is caused by human activity. The science is settled. 99.97% of scientists who have studied the problem agree. The one scientist who didn't died of heat stroke in Skagway.
We must do something about this immediately! If we don't, the climate on Jupiter will be permanently changed, with unimaginable consequences for mankind!
What can we do about this catastrophe? I'm not sure, but I'm applying for a $100-million grant to study the problem. (Let's see: I'll budget $1 million to study the problem. I can farm out the work to a scientist in India – they work cheap. Another $2 million ought to be enough to finance a decent Twitter campaign to hype the problem. With the other $97 million I'll attempt to emulate Al Gore's lifestyle. One must keep up appearances after all. I'm not sure this can be done on such a small budget, but I'll sure try.)
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