I recently went to the Superior Court here in town to get my passport renewed.

I had downloaded the forms from the State Department website, filled them out, and then printed them at home with all the is dotted and the ts crossed.   All I had to do was sign them in front of the clerk and take an oath that I was submitting factual data and was not trying to "fool Mother Nature."  And, of course, I had to be ready to fork over the required $135 application fee – $110 to the State Department and $25 to the wonderful staff of the Superior Court for their time and effort.

About that effort on behalf of the Superior Court staff – I showed up at the correct window with all required paperwork in hand and was immediately told I couldn't submit my application because it was the wrong color.  Apparently my printer didn't print out the correct pallet (mine came out a shade of orange, but the application is supposed to be "gold"), so it was disallowed.  I had to go over to their little rack on the wall, take the appropriate (and "officially colored") forms that were there, go to a little table in the corner, and stand there while I filled them out by hand (making sure that I used black ink).  When I made a comment under my breath that this was a little odd, the clerk immediately got snippy with me and asked if I had a problem.  Recognizing that the clerk was about to wield her almighty bureaucratic power over me and do something to my application like "misfile" or "lose" it, I told her I was just amused.

Truth be known, I wanted to say, "This government allows non-citizens to enter and stay in this country and even gives them benefits paid for with my tax dollars, and I can't submit my application for a passport because the form is the wrong color?  Yes, I do have a problem – with this stupid government and the manner in which it is run.  I served this nation for 22 years, to include volunteering for a combat tour in Southeast Asia, basically signing a blank check for an amount up to and including my life.  I went where I was told when I was told, with no questions asked, and now my gubmint tells me that my passport application is not valid because it is the wrong color?!  Why don't you just have a white form with black print and allow a citizen to complete and turn that in?  Who the heck gives a flying flip if the form is gold, avocado green, magenta, or fuchsia?"

I also wanted to ask, "Which buffoon at the State Department directed that all passport applications had to be made on a form that was the correct color?  Was it her highness Hillary Rodham Clinton, or maybe John "Heinz" Kerry?  Or was it some low-level GS-2.5 who wants to leave a legacy from his career in gubmint service?"

I am now awaiting my passport to arrive in the mail – I'm going to England on business and can only hope the person who looks at my passport upon my arrival there accepts it for the color in which my gubmint created it.

Dale Hill is a retired USAF colonel who flew fighters using the call sign "Boots."  His motto in life is Audeces fortuna juvat! – Fortune favors the bold!