Let's celebrate the great successes of the TSA!

By Newsmachete

It was just announced that in an extensive test of the TSA's security, the TSA intercepted attempts to bring dangerous items onto planes 5% of the time. This sends a clear message to terrorists that if they try to bring weapons or explosives onto airplanes, there is only a 1-in-20 (note: this number was earlier gotten wrong do to an editing mistake, not the author) chance they will be caught.

In light of this great success, I thought it would be appropriate to highlight some of the TSA's greatest achievements over the years:

o The TSA successfully detected and fired one of its own homosexual employees who was groping men:

Here's how police say the scheme worked: When the male TSA officer noticed a man he found attractive, he would alert a female TSA officer.

The female officer would then tell the screening machine that a female passenger -- not a male -- was walking through. And that information would trigger a machine to register an anomaly in the groin area, prompting the male TSA officer to pat down the passenger, police said, citing a TSA investigation.

But during the patdown, the male TSA officer used the palms of his hands to touch the passenger's front groin area and buttocks, which violates TSA policy.

o TSA arrested one of its own officers smuggling cocaine.

o TSA arrested TSA agents molesting a child, watching kiddie porn, watching more kiddie porn, and watching even more kiddie porn.

o TSA rep arrested for bank robbery.

o TSA reps accused of stealing, again, and again, and again.

In fact, crime among Department of Homeland Security agents generally has been quite a problem:

BORDER PATROL AGENTS smuggling weed and coke. Immigration agents forging documents and robbing drug dealers. TSA employees caught with child porn. Those are just a few of the crimes perpetrated by Department of Homeland Security employees in just the past year.

Since the creation of the Department of Homeland Security nearly a decade ago, the agency’s inspector general has been tasked with uncovering corruption, waste and criminality within its own ranks. The IG has had his hands full.

According to a newly released DHS inspector general’s summary of its significant investigations, 318 DHS employees and contractors were arrested in 2011(.pdf). That’s about one arrest per weekday of the men and women who are supposed to be keeping the country safe

When TSA agents were federalized and unionized, I was sure the TSA would live up to the standards of our best and brightest government. They haven't disappointed in the slightest.

This article was produced by NewsMachete.com, the conservative news site.