Obama's operatives in the White House and the media will be going out of their way to put lipstick on this piggy, but no matter what shade you use, that swine is still painfully ugly.

The long-awaited figures show that 26,794 people "bought" health insurance on the federal website, covering 36 states. Another 79,391 "bought" policies on state-run websites.

"Enrollment includes those who have selected a plan who either have or have not yet paid the first month's premium," HHS said.

Think about that. Even these figures are optimistic since it includes people that haven't decided if they're willing to cut a check. It's the equivalent of shopping on Amazon and and putting something in your shopping cart that you then fail to buy. HHS is recognizing that as a sale even though you haven't bought anything.

Imagine if every online retailer recognized sales whenever somebody dropped something into the shopping cart. It would be a massive fraud. The Feds would be tossing the CEO's into jail and throwing away the keys.

Considering all the problems with the website, the 106,185 figure might sound pretty good to the typical low-information Liberal. Don't be surprised if there isn't some positive spin spewing from the talking heads on MSNBC and beyond.

Let's break it down to get a better feel for just how bad these numbers are:

в—Џ 26,794 divided by 36 states = 744 people per state participating on the government exchange

в—Џ106,185 divided by 57 states (sorry, 50 states) = 2,123 per state nationally

в—Џ 106,185 divided by 315 million = .000337 or 0.0337%.

If 15 million is an insignificant sliver according to Jay Carney and Obama, what's this?

Here's a good one -- Everyone that signed up could fit in Michigan Stadium with 3,716 seats empty.

If Obama needs seven million people signed up and paying by March in order to break even, at this rate he will fall over 60 months short.

Approximately 4.8 million people have lost their policies. That means that for every one person who signed up, 45 lost their coverage in October.

There is just no good way to spin this news.