This week, NPR aired a story about the recent "hiatus" in global warming. While I certainly expected the same-old, same-old, I didn't anticipate the depths of 'double-think' to which NPR is capable of stooping. Talk about an anti-intellectual shell game; in order to listen to this story with a straight face, the listener must forget everything he or she has ever been told (by the media) about the subject.

After all -- Oceania has always been allied with Eurasia against Eastasia!

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" has consistently failed to predict any such cooling.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" never previously 'assured us' that pollution in China could counteract the effects of increased atmospheric CO2.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" frequently warned us that the oceans are getting dangerously hot.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" foresaw no such abatement in climbing temperatures.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" has, in the past, associated volcanic activity with global warming, rather than with global cooling.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" should never have to stop, pause, contort, adjust, and reassure us (it's settled science, after all!).

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" must invent inherently contradictory notions (the reason oceans are colder is that they are storing extra heat!) to keep their hypothesis intact.

Never mind -- that "the settled science of anthropogenic global warming" used to tell us the exact opposite of what they now tell us makes perfect sense (ex post facto), namely, that summers would be warmer, but winters would be colder.

What's important is that the faith in the foundational theory is maintained!

Please -- no need to flirt with agnosticism on this topic, for we, the media, shepherds of the sacred truth, have once again rescued the theory of Anthropogenic Global Warming!