November will be here before we know it, and meanwhile folks are still yammering over phraseology. We're just getting plain tongue-tied when we talk with our friends and family members who are avoiding being informed, but who are intending to vote anyway. So here's a handy-dandy guide to print up and tape on the bathroom mirror for practice between flossing and brushing!

When they say "level the playing field," we say that we're sorry that they're suffering due to their envy, but that such suffering cannot be the rationale for destroying a democratic republic which supports the rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

When they roll their eyes at words such as "market," "economy," and "capitalism," we remind folks that the marketplace is where we exercise our God-given free will on a daily basis, with choices great and small.

When they complain about militarism, we say that our national defense is our metaphorical national immune system. Who or what can last long without an immune system?

When they say that Rush Limbaugh is abusive, we say that he is an absurdist, and that they aren't listening well enough or long enough to comprehend his humor.

When they say "reproductive choice," we say that we prefer heightened legal protections from rape and increased accommodations for pregnant girls and women, such as at school and at work.

When they say LGBT rights, we say, "How would it make you feel to be a one year-old girl adopted by 'two daddies' when you could have been adopted by a mommy and a daddy?"

When they say no more incandescent light bulbs, we say that we prefer to use mercury-free light bulbs, such as incandescents.

When they say "global warming," we say that we prefer environmental stewardship that begins at home, not international coercion of the whole human race based upon shaky science.

When they say that the regulations say no, we say, "Are the regulations within the scope of the statutory law?"

When they say that the statutory law says no, we say, "Is that law constitutional?"

When they say that the Constitution is old-fashioned, we say that it was intended to be read-along with the Declaration of Independence, Articles of Confederation and the Northwest Ordinance-as the organic law of our nation. These documents are written in plain English, susceptible of comprehension by every adult American, even a Supreme Court Chief Justice!

When they say to give Obamacare a try, we say that we desire neither to enslave our doctors, nor to support death panels--not even one try!

When they say that church must be separated from state, we correct them:   the state must not impinge upon our practice of religion, as long as our practice does not harm others, as harm is reasonably understood.

When they say that we can't stand on the sidewalk and hold that sign, we say, "Let's be clear here: are you denying us our freedom of speech?"

When they say, "New World Order," we say, "Do you mean dictatorship over the whole world?"

When they say, "Happy White Independence Day," we say that the signers of the Declaration of Independence were risking their lives by declaring independence for our nation-at the beginning of the War for Independence, before they knew that they would win. Since then, many men and women of our nation have also shed blood to attain for others freedom from slavery, suffrage for former slaves and their descendants, suffrage for women, property rights for women and former slaves, and freedom from tyranny in many other parts of the world. We have also tried to correct the evil committed against Japanese-Americans interred during World War II. Even today, many people of good-will give peaceful witness and aid to pregnant and postpartum mothers in order to attain complete fulfillment of the right to life for preborn humans.

When they say, "Let's talk about illegal immigrants," we say that we want all immigrants to hold their heads high, rather than for some immigrants to be poorly paid serfs in an oligarchy's gray markets.

When they say that they're liberal, we say that what is known as conservatism today is yesterday's classical liberalism, by way of conservative liberalism, with a good dose of Christian natural law. We say that what is known as liberalism and moderate Republicanism today is yesterday's atheist statist, by way of legal positivism and progressivism. Then the question becomes, "Whom do you want for your boss, a human dictator, or yourself within the confines of the nation's best and most humble guess as to God's Will in a democratic republic immersed in a tried-and-true Constitution that protects minorities' rights?"

When they say that they're reading [substitute in any of the latest vampire/zombie books available], we say that we're reading the Bible, Richard Cox's Four Pillars of Constitutionalism, and Mark Levin's Liberty and Tyranny.

Marianna Trzeciak, Esq.'s writings have been published in LifeNews, LifeSiteNews, and Catholic and secular print news sources.