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January 27, 2011

Half Way Through Al Gore's Decade To Doom

By Gregory Oatis

Five years ago today, in the months prior to the release of his movie, An Inconvenient Truth, the beloved future Nobel Peace Prize winner and ecological prophet, Al Gore, was at the Sundance Film Festival making a fearsome prediction:

We have only ten years left to save the planet from thermal disaster.

At the time, dittoheads may recall, Rush Limbaugh picked up on the forecast and began tracking the progress of the impending disaster. Hence the page on Rush's website ("Algore Doomsday Clock") dedicated to the countdown.

Admittedly, despite Al's heartfelt exhortations, no nation on earth has implemented the draconian anti-carbon, anti-prosperity measures that our ecological betters have been advocating. So where do we as a planet stand today, precisely half way down the slide to global oblivion?

Well, with snows totaling more than three feet this month, January 2011 is the absolute, Number One, hands-down snowiest ever recorded in the history of this East Coast global warming opinion center.

(And be sure to keep those funny hats and blow toys close at hand, as more fluffy white global change is predicted for the next few days.)

But of course, that's just an anecdotal climactic anomaly, right? No conclusions can be drawn from it whatsoever, since NYC is just a single point on the vast global expanse. Right?

Well, yes and no. Because NYC is hardly alone. Locales across North America and Europe are reporting cold and snow at historic levels.

In fact, today's Daily Star out of London reports that the winter of 2010-2011 may be England's coldest in more than 1,000 years. (Due to some irregularities with the data in the years prior to the mid-17th century, weather experts can't be absolutely definitive in their claim.)

So far, no word from Mr. Gore -- or his fiery crystal ball -- on what the next five years holds as we advance toward possible extinction.

(Sigh.)

As someone still in thrall to the silly superstition that is religion, I can only observe that God has a tremendous sense of humor.
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