Obama's unusual antecedents

The Los Angeles Times reports that The New England Historic Genealogical Society has revealed that future former President Obama and Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown share a common ancestry.

The New England genealogy experts report that Obama's mother, Stanley Ann Dunham, and Brown's mother, Judith Ann Rugg, both descended from Richard Singletary of Haverhill, Mass. He died in 1687 at 102.

Obama descends from Singletary's eldest son Jonathan, who later changed his last name to Dunham. Brown descends from Singletary's other son Nathaniel.

The New England Genealogical Society had previously discovered that the future former president shares ancestry with former presidents James Madison, Harry Truman, LBJ, Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter, George H. W. Bush and George W. Bush.

Meanwhile, researchers with the Hartland Township Genealogical Lab and Billiards Emporium  in Obama's home state of Illinois have uncovered an unprecedented number of historic figures which share common ancestry with the future former president. The list of noted historical figures includes; Genghis Kahn, Ivan The Terrible, Attila The Hun, Vladimir Ulianov (Lenin), Iosif Djugashvili (Stalin), Alolph Hitler, Fidel Castro, Hugo Chavez, Nancy Pelosi, Osama Bin Laden and Barack H. Obama Sr.

The lab has come under intense criticism from humorless Obama supporters who contend that by tracing the future former president's family tree back to Noah, Hartland is free to claim common ancestry with all persons dating from the great flood. The anger among Obama's most ardent comrades is concentrated on the fact that the lab listed only infamous persons instead of connecting Mr. Obama with great historical figures such as Karl Marx, Mao Tse-tung, Jane Fonda or Stokley Carmichael.

Community organizers and agitators from nearby Obamagrad (Chicago) stormed the Hartland facility in an early morning raid. Much to their surprise they found the building to be empty which the exception of an old black card table, two folding chairs, a copy of Saul Alinsky's "Rules For Radicals" and a trash can full of green synthetic fibers which looked suspiciously like grass roots.

No attempt was made to reach David Axelrod for comment.

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