Well hell's bells, pardon me for the blessed common sense bestowed on me by my old, hard-muscled grandpappy, not to mention my inherited sense of his fairly well developed irony (well, for an old, hard-scrabble carpenter born and raised in what is now smarmily referred to as flyover land by them Blue-Coast Buttholes) But geez, folks...don't anyone besides me notice a trend here in how every time the Anthropogenic (whatever that means) Global Warming crowd gens up an event to promote their ding-a-ling ideas, Mother Earth tends to rain (well, more likely snow) on their parades?

For cryin' out loud, here's our suck-up and bend-over president rushin' off to Copenhagen to convince the world we need to shackle ourselves to economy-bustin' environmental regulations to relieve a perceived global warmin' phenomenon and here in flyover land me and Charlene and millions of our fellow Americans are up to their tight blue buns in butt-freezin' snowfall.

Whoabama! Time for a reality check, maybe, hmmm?

And truly cousin, this isn't anything new. Every time ol' Al sticks that big ol' nose outdoors it tends to get blued while his message gets skewed. Not to be outdone by a mere, seriously sissified, ex-vice president in earth tones, Speaker Nancy (Ironjaws) Pelosi also has her conflicts with Mother Nature. Off topic fer a second: I'm curious; you reckon she could whup Al?

Hey, is it possible this ol' boy here from flyover country has stumbled onto a new climate trend?  Hell, based on what I been hearin' lately, I'll bet my science is every bit as solid as theirs. I done run a computer model with my 1979 WordStar software an' it says Al and them other ol' boys is full of it. We fixin' to freeze our butts off.

New York Times, gimme a call, you hear? Newsweek? TIME? Anybuddy?

Hey, Charlene, what the hell's that polar bear doin' in the dog pen? Git him outta there ‘fore he eats all the dog chow, woman! You know them damned things eats like they's on a congressional expense account for cryin' out loud!