Why I must be a racist

By Sammy Benoit

The Joe Wilson controversy has caused me to spend some time soul searching. After examining the 6,000 posts written on The Lid and here at American Thinker over the past few years and after conducting some deep self-reflection, there is just one conclusion, they are correct...I am a racist.

Because I was concerned that Barack Obama associated with domestic terrorist Bill Ayers, I am a racist.

Because I think that Joe Wilson's "you lie" comment was true, but they way he said it and the venue he said it in was inappropriate, I am a racist.

Because I am worried that the health care plans pushed by President Obama will diminish the quality of medical care for my Caucasian parents and children (and end up raising their taxes too) I am a racist.

Because I think Jimmy Carter is a horse's ass for defending President Obama by calling his detractors racist, I am a racist.

Because I believe that David Letterman is no longer funny because all he does is "suck up" to Barack Obama, I am a racist

Because I believe that in exposing some of the scary people around President Obama (like Science Czar John Holdren or Regulatory Czar Cass Sunstein), Glen Beck is performing a great service to America, I am a racist.

Because I believe Barack Obama has surrounded himself with Anti-Israel advisers such as Samantha Powers, I am a racist.

Because I believe that the stimulus bill created by Nancy Pelosi and pushed through by Barack Obama was bad for America, I am a racist.

Because I believe my Congressman, Steve Israel is wrong when he keeps voting for the President's agenda without reading the bills, I am a racist.

Because I believe that "news reporters" who blindly advocate for the President like Charlie Gibson, Katie Couric and Keith Olbermann, are defaming the memory of real reporters like Edward R. Murrow, I am a racist.

Because I believe that Congressman Jerrold Nadler is wrong to stop congress from investigating ACORN, I am a racist.

Because I think that Wade Rathke set up ACORN as a multi-pronged criminal enterprise, I am a racist.

Because I believe that President Barack Obama was correct when he called Kanye West a jackass, I am a racist.

By now you must have seen the pattern I saw upon self-reflection. Look at all the names in bold. The people above that I knocked all have one thing in common. Each and every one of them has a Caucasian mother.

You see, upon self-reflection I have determined that I must be a racist; I must hate everyone who has at least one White Parent.

Oh and one more, because I think that even I am a racist, and since I am Caucasian and bash so many others who have Caucasian DNA such as President Obama, Sammy Benoit is a racist.

Sammy Benoit is Editor of the political blog, The Lid.