PrintJanuary 19, 2009
The Warmist Shamans
Shaman James Hansen has proclaimed that we only have four years left before the world falls into climate catastrophy. The oceans will rise, species will die, the gates of hell will open, and general wailing and gnashing of teeth will prevail over mankind. Dr. Hansen, director of NASA's Goddard Institute for Space Studies, is the world's leading witch doctor crusading against manmade global warming. He has taken this title away from Bigfoot Al, who is increasingly reticent in discussing his own giant carbon footprint in public.
The question arises as to why the George Soros-funded scientist has demanded this time-horizon (President Obama's first term) for decisive action to thwart armagedden. In the immediate future, we are going to hear increasingly desperate pleas from the true believers of Climatotholicism that the end is near. We must act now, or be lost forever. This is the start of a phenomenon I am calling the Shaman Shamboozle.
The shaman has been a central part of tribal development in almost every culture on Earth. From Greek paganism to the Mongol hordes to Native American tribes, the shaman has been the most influential source of religion and mysticism throughout history. The shaman also was the conduit between man and nature, and set up laws and taboos to regulate man's behavior toward the environment. As Wikipedia states concerning shaman as ecologist:
As the primary teacher of tribal symbolism, the shaman may have a leading role in this ecological management, actively restricting hunting and fishing.
How did the shaman gain this power over the tribe? Slight-of-hand, ventriloquism, and other trickery was used to convince the other members of the tribe that he had the ability to ward off evil spirits. Through knowledge of astronomy, one of the most popular techniques was to gain tribal power using a solar eclipse. As the Sun was overshadowed by the Moon, the shaman proclaimed that it was being devoured by a sinister force. The Incas called it the Black Jaguar. To Mongols, the god Rah was the culprit. Whatever the evil spirit was called, the shaman's act was essentially the same. The tribe's chief ecologist would scream and dance, whipping the tribe members into a frenzy. Ultimately, the Sun would return, and the shaman would revel in the tribe's adulation while sealing his power.
Dr. Hansen and his fellow witch doctors must act fast. Using the principle of the Shaman Shamboozle, the evil global warming spirits must be chased away before it is obvious to the tribal masses that the climate is actually getting cooler. In doing so, the shaman ecologists can claim that President Obama's "green initiatives", i.e., taxing anything that emits carbon dioxide, were successful. At that point their political power over the tribe will be complete and irreversable. Let the dance commence before the eclipse begins to wane!
