Faithful readers know that I consider Larry David a comic genius, regrettably in thrall to his wife Laurie's dogmatic enviro—leftism. Mrs. David is an activist, and has been a fundraiser for the hypocritical  Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.

Mrs. David herself has plundered sensitive wetlands without a proper building permit  and regularly flies to New York on private jets, all the while denouncing SUV drivers in the name of energy conservation.

Redeeming Larry David from his wife's wacky politics is a life's mission for me. So I am providing Mr. David a gift worth almost $9000.00 ($8990.00, to be exact). Moreover, the laws of the State of California entitle me to collect a fee of up to 10% for this information, money I will forgo, even though I need it more than does the zillionaire co—creator of Seinfeld and creator/writer/star of Curb Your Enthusiasm.

All I ask in return is the opportunity to talk about politics with Mr. David over lunch or dinner some day. I will fly to Los Angeles on my own dime if he will pick up the check. If Mrs. David sends her jet, lunch is on me.

Consider it another Festivus miracle, Larry. Here's what you need to do:

Go here and pick up the unclaimed property the State of California is holding for you. This one is a check for $1050 from Castle Rock Pictures.

Then go here and pick up a check for $7940 that State Farm Insurance owes you.

Oh, and by the way, if Governor Schwartzenegger is reading this, I'd love to talk to you about your new chief of staff over lunch. There's some money in it for you.

Thomas Lifson   12 22 05