A New York Mule with a Mind of His Own

During the course of the Bush years and Obama administration, an inept and ignorant – yet arrogant – Progressive influence regained control of the Republican Party leadership and policies.  Going back to the days of Teddy Roosevelt, Progressives have held an influence in forming the Republican Party platform – some election cycles stronger than others.  But make no mistake about it!  As soon as Ronald Reagan boarded the plane for that last trip to California, the Bush Progressives seized control, crated up the elephant, and sold her to the circus.  Much as CBS had done in the late '60s when the network wanted to shake its "country bumpkin" image and canceled all of their highly rated rural themed comedy programming; highbrow Washington party insiders, embarrassed by their perceived "Middle America grassroots" image and yearning to attract a more glamorous and sophisticated following, plotted to overthrow the Reagan remnant of the party and do a remake of the party image. 

Democrats had the glamor of Hollywood, the intelligence of the Eastern Elitist, and the sophistication of the Upper East Side.  In an effort to remedy the problem, Republican Party insiders immediately began isolating and muzzling the conservative element within the party.  And as Democrats inched farther to the left, the Republican leadership slid closer to the middle – and beyond.

Then, with the explosion of the Tea Party movement, those same party masters, failing to recognize or appreciate the value these enthusiastic and feasible patrons could bring to the minority political party, locked arms with their liberal Democrat cousins, summoned their hacks to launch an attack of ridicule on the protesters, and disavowed any association with the Tea Party advocates.  Finally, in an effort to ensure total control of the party's direction and purpose, the D.C. establishment pushed, hid, and locked the belligerent non-conformists out of sight and out of mind.  Their plan: establish their handpicked presidential candidate in a position to win the nomination and keep the dissenters corralled away in the barn until you need their numbers for the general election.  Then, after their man had secured the nomination, release the mutineers, encourage their vote, and then ignore them again until they go away.  Who needs the old musky elephant when you have a political thoroughbred ready in the gate? 

However, through all of the planning and manipulating, through all of the upgrades and revamping, and through all of the neglect and abuse of their political base, the Republican elitists failed to comprehend one thing.  Their bitch was in heat!

Meanwhile, across the aisle on the Democrat side, Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi long ago turned their noses up at the tired old donkey that had been ridden so often to victory by forgotten moderates of the old Democrat Party – heroes such as "Scoop" Jackson, Dale Bumpers, Sam Rayburn, Sam Nunn, and even a younger Jimmy Carter (before he morphed into the person he is today).  Reid and Pelosi released the old reliable Beast of Burden out to pasture on his own.  The speaker and the majority leader had a more pressing issue; arm-twisting their own Progressive, ultra-liberal agenda for a naive American public while entertaining themselves as puppeteers for their new little minion living up the road on Pennsylvania Ave.

So as Barack, Harry, Nancy, the MSM, Hollywood, and the Eastern elitists rode a fast-burning comet to new limits along the fringes of the Progressive movement and ultra-liberalism – all the while leaving their grassroots supporters in their blazing tail – the majority of American voters rejected their chosen course and gave Republicans control of the Congress.

But more often than not, Republicans are unable to lead, and they run into trouble when handed the gavel.  In football, many a team has lost a close game because they "play not to lose" rather than "play to win."  And that's normally the Republican philosophy: play not to lose.  The reason is that the minority party traditionally is playing against the Democrats – and the MSM.  They know that if they stand up to Democrat bullying, the national media will take them to the woodshed. 

So it should have come as no surprise to the elitist of either party that while Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell were snuggling up with Barack Obama – and Harry and Nancy whispering words of encouragement through the keyhole to the Lincoln bedroom – that an old donkey that still had fire in his heart would wander into a barn housing a fiery young filly ready to run and that the unlikely pair would produce something unplanned and unexpected while the masters slept.  By the time they were awakened by the doors being blown off their big red barn, Paul and Mitch were caught with their pants on the ground and staring up at a stubborn young mule standing atop their chest – yawing a message that made their ears hurt.

However, any intelligent being outside the Washington loop, Manhattan, and Hollywood knows that if you cross an ornery old jack with a fiery young filly, you get...a mule!  Therefore, it is only logical that if you cross a moderate Democrat with a disgruntled Tea Party enthusiast, you end up with...Donald Trump!

So now the Republican Party has a hybrid candidate unlike any the world has ever known.  The Republicans were forced to lay claim to him as he came out of their barn – but they don't know what to do with him.  The spry little bastard has become an embarrassment to the leadership of the Republican Party.  And with the Democrats and the MSM scooping up his manure and spreading it across the internet and other media outlets every time he drops a pile, the stench of his campaign nauseates the country.

Unfortunately, the Grand Old Party have found their long-eared half-breed to be untethered and pigheaded.  He pulls his plow wherever he desires.  Threatening to destroy the established crops ready for harvest for this election cycle, this unbridled plow horse tills the ground as he cuts a furrow through the middle of the field – upending everything in his path, while Republican leaders run behind shouting unheeded threats and commands.

So while Democrats yearn to maintain power and place the first woman in the White House, Republicans can only stand by and reason that their presidential offering will at least not be the first jackass to let out a long brassy yaw from behind the desk in the Oval Office.

S.A. Collins is an USAF retiree, author, and blogger.  He maintains a website at  www.popknowseverything.com.

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