Does being 'Schlonged' make Hillary a 'Bimbo Eruption?'
Every one knows that presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton has been married for 40 years to former president Bill Clinton. And although Bill and Hill are motivated by very different goals, the couple is a lot alike in their single-minded commitment to whatever it is they’re individually pursuing.
For one, Bill is legendary and thus far unrivaled for his reputation as a ravenous womanizing tomcat. But as renowned as her hubby’s appetite for extramarital undertakings may be, he is matched, and maybe even surpassed, by Hillary’s voracious hunger for political power.
When it comes to the pursuit of that power, Hillary Clinton hunts down positions of authority with the same intensity that her horndog husband exhibits when chasing skirts. Of late, the mere thought of finally grasping the golden ring called the U.S. presidency has Hillary looking more excited than Bill did when he was photographed sandwiched between two brothel workers from the Bunny Ranch at a charity event.
Likewise Bill, whose reprobate behavior makes Charlie Sheen look like Fred Rogers, has been unwavering in his carnal pursuits. So, in other words, while hubby was carving notches on his belt, Hillary was gathering unto herself constituents who prefer estrogen to veracity.
Clinton works hard to convince America that a pantsuit on a woman ensures the intestinal fortitude to go toe-to-toe with Vladimir Putin and a nuclear Iran. Yet in an effort to divert attention from her own dysfunctional marriage, and despite being publicly humiliated for 40 years by her hubby, Hillary plays the victim by accusing political adversaries of what she prefers to overlook in her own husband.
For example, during her 2000 bid for the New York’s junior senatorial seat, Hillary’s debate opponent, Republican congressman Rick Lazio, supposedly invaded her space when he approached her podium and asked the former first lady to sign a campaign finance pledge. Hillary’s staff worked overtime to portray this move as virtual assault and battery. Looking for any opportunity to turn Lazio’s advantage into a deficit, the Clinton campaign portrayed the New York legislator as a “menacing” bully who treats males different than females.
That Academy Award-worthy performance was as Machiavellian as her husband Bill’s, who, when not sharing family stories at Save the Children fundraisers, boards the Lolita Express and flies with pedophile Jeffrey Epstein to Orgy Island.
Moreover, and notwithstanding making light of Slick Willy being accused of everything from indecent exposure to rape at that time, after successfully convincing voters that a man asking for her signature at a political debate was sexist -- Hillary won the election.
Those sorts of Clinton strategies are diabolical because Mrs. Clinton was, and is, well aware that Bill preys upon women, but rather than focus on her marriage, Hillary accuses other men of things she should acknowledge in her own husband.
But then again, the truth is that, especially when dealing with a “brazen genius” like Republican presidential frontrunner Donald Trump, Mrs. Clinton could use a pantsuit leg up. That’s why being a perpetually-offended woman might be a powerful weapon in 2016.
In fact, a shrewd calculation may be the reason Hillary conveniently forgot to mention that her husband, based solely on his reputation as an adulterous fornicator, earned a starring role in an ISIS propaganda/recruitment video. Instead, the woman who habitually gets her video stories confused insisted at the last Democratic debate that anti-Muslim videos starring Donald Trump were being used in the Middle East to recruit for ISIS.
After Trump found out that Hillary accused him of being a conscription tool for the Islamic state, the Republican presidential frontrunner quickly demanded that she issue an apology. Instead of saying “what difference, at this point, does it make,” Mrs. Clinton decided that now was as good a time as any to conjure up a sexism distraction. And what better way for the wife of a notorious womanizer to change the subject than to fault another man for the very thing her misogynist hubby excels in?
So here’s what Hillary did.
On a bathroom break during the Democratic debate, Clinton lingered long enough in the ladies’ bathroom to make news. True to form, stream-of-consciousness Trump said Hillary’s longer-than-usual time in the commode was too “disgusting” to talk about. Clinton did not hesitate to seize the opportunity to spin Trump’s comment into an accusation of sexism.
Working it like a pro, the feminist icon's camp argues that Trump’s comment about her in the bathroom, doing God knows what “with a cloth or something,” is what is “derogatory” and “disgusting.” Meanwhile, Hillary is exempt from the standard Donald Trump is being held to, as both she and her supporters insist that her remark about Trump being ISIS’s biggest recruitment tool is neither one of those things.
Earth to the $2 billion Alzheimer’s advocate: Islam’s treatment of women is what’s “derogatory” and “disgusting.” Hence, if Donald Trump were the male chauvinist pig that the lady who couldn’t retrace her steps from the bathroom back to the debate podium says he is, ISIS would be commending Mr. Trump as a male hero, not using his face as a recruitment tool to rile up radical jihadis.
Nonetheless, it appears that going forward, Hillary Clinton will look to spin every comment into a sexism accusation.
So, with that in mind, after Trump pronounced that Hillary was “schlonged” by Obama in 2008, maybe Mrs. Clinton could explain at the next debate why she labeled the women her husband schlonged with the sexist title “bimbo eruptions.”
Jeannie hosts a blog at www.jeannie-ology.com