December 7, 2009
'Absolutely!' Wrong
Watching reality TV is a guilty pleasure. It can also be a cultural and political learning experience. Take, for instance, when Jason Mesnick was the lucky man on The Bachelor. It was during that season that a star was born. No, not the adorable little Ty Mesnick -- it was the word "absolutely."
On the show, former Dallas Cowboys cheerleader and Bachelorette Melissa Rycroft incessantly used the word "absolutely." Jason would ask her, "Will you accept this rose?" Melissa would reply, "Absolutely." Jason would grab her hand and ask, "Can I steal you?" Melissa's response: "Absolutely!"
Melissa said the word absolutely so often that she became known at our house as "The Absolutely Girl." After a while, it was obvious that it was absolutely impossible for Melissa to get through a sentence without saying the word absolutely, which became absolutely annoying on many levels.
Yet in the wider world, if you pay attention, it is obvious that "absolutely" has become the new "totally." It was the word of the day making its way into the vernacular, replacing old favorites like "I hear ya," "awesome," and "dude!" Everyone from the IT guy at work to the girl behind the deli counter became "absolutely" positive about everything from running a database to putting cream cheese on bagels.
Absolutely is such an emphatic statement. Who can argue with it? The word smacks of self-confidence, assurance, and control. However, in a world where no one is sure whether the future holds nuclear annihilation, or whether they'll be handed a pink slip next week, "absolutely," quite frankly, seems inappropriate and out of place.
One has to wonder how something so small and simple can become so pervasive that every question asked is answered with "absolutely." It's a pandemic. Absolutely has become an H1N1-style national vocabulary emergency. We need a vaccine to stop the spread.
What is it that makes people mimic other people to the point where they become mindless androids? If it's so easy to get millions to use a word just by saying it over and over again, isn't it also a simple task to manipulate minds to believe falsehoods? That is how politicians work their way into the brain. They say same thing over and over again until the public accepts a lie in place of the truth.
Take for example the last election, where what started as innuendo morphed into full-blown brainwashing. Obama and his minions wormed their way into the American brain. They "absolutely" used the repetitive method to get into the electorate's head -- to the point where people are now convinced George W. Bush is dumb and Barack Obama is a genius.
Indoctrination is on full display on websites like Kid's IQ Test Center, which says, "Barack Obama's estimated IQ score range is 130 to 148 and quite possibly higher." However, nowhere on the internet can anyone locate Obama's IQ score, college transcript, GPA, SAT score, LSAT score, or any other tangible evidence of his IQ. The lack of verification has done nothing to dampen the myth of Obama's genius, which has gone viral and infected the culture.
Barack Obama is a genius, all right! During the election, "hope" and "change" became buzzwords. Obama managed to inspire a nation to the point of being absolutely convinced we needed something no one even understood -- it was absolutely brilliant! Everyone stormed the cattle-car, clamoring to get on board, having no idea where they were headed or what to expect upon arrival.
And let's not forget the ever-faithful left-wing media using repetition to catapult someone with absolutely no executive experience whatsoever into the highest office in the land. Say "Polly wants a cracker" long enough, and before you know it, even Polly thinks she wants a cracker. Now America has elected someone so unqualified that as Commander in Chief, he is as out of place as the word "absolutely" is at the end of a sentence uttered from the newspaper boy when asked if he has change for a dollar.
Nevertheless, the president is smart enough to know the drill. He has undertaken the herculean effort of mentioning himself thousands of times in speeches. In due time, every question formerly answered with "absolutely" will be henceforth answered with "Obama," whether applicable or not.
This monotonous method has proven so successful that America has been transformed into a nation absolutely persuaded. Take for instance the claim that the stimulus worked and jobs were saved. Pundits repeated the lie as the unemployment rate soared. Did the stimulus work? Absolutely!
Or, how about the one that the majority of Americans favor a public option in the health care bill -- while 87% claim they are happy with what they have Huh? Will we have a public option in a bill by the end of the year? The Dems are even working weekends to make it happen.
Obama and his policies are decimating the economy, the private sector, our standing in the world community, and our national security The appointment of his czars can be likened to an unadulterated shredding of constitutional balance of power. Yet Obama remains absolutely committed to razing health care, pulling out of Afghanistan in eighteen months, and making short work of capitalism and free enterprise. The Absolute Leader of the Free World is presently the proprietor of political and social pandemonium. We might as well have the indecisive, befuddled Jason Mesnick in the Oval Office.
Whenr the Bachelor asked Melissa to marry him, she was absolutely enthralled, and she replied, "Absolutely!" Two weeks later, he dumped her. How could Melissa have missed the fact that Jason was absolutely in love with Molly Malaney?
Even though we are on the precipice of absolute disaster, there are still those unlikely suspects who are absolutely convinced Obama is doing a great job. The truth is that Obama's popularity is dropping faster than Jason Mesnick jettisoned Melissa from a sordid love triangle.
Miss Rycroft ecstatically accepted the final rose, slipped the ring on her finger and said "yes" to a marriage proposal. The whole time, she remained absolutely oblivious to the fact that Jason wasn't the man she thought he was. Absolute chaos, humiliation, and turmoil followed a devastated "Absolutely Girl" for weeks afterward...sort of like a nation that finds out too late that Barack Obama was absolutely the wrong person for the job.
Author's content: jeannie-ology.com