Horror! Harry Potter a 'Zionist Plot' - Iranian TV

Who would have thought? Harry Potter, the bespectacled wizard who has empowered children the world over to believe they can ride a broom, is part of a deep, dark plot to realize the dream of Zionist control of the world:

Iranian state television has come to the conclusion that Harry Potter is a Zionist plot. The documentary, which you can watch here, features several "experts" discussing the wildly popular series of books and movies.

One of the experts quoted in the documentary says that Harry Potter is part of a "cultural crusade" and through the movies "they [Zionists] are indirectly saying: 'join us.'"

The documentary, which shows many of the darker scenes from the series, concludes that elements of the Kabbalah are presented in the movies. One expert says that Harry Potter is portrayed as the Messiah and the film touches on Armadeggon, which he says fits into popular Christian Zionist beliefs.

In 2007, Iran's ultra-conservative daily "Kayhan" called Harry Potter "a billion-dollar Zionist project" and a "destructive bomb" for children's minds. It alleged that the author J.K. Rowling had links to Zionists and that was how she became so well known.

Iranian TV sounds far more interesting than the stuff we get here. Just last year they ran a documentary on how the movie "Chicken Run" was not a send up of the classic war film "The Great Escape" but another plot by Zionists to spread their evil message. Also, their 9/11 documentary was a truther's dream come true as they had so many conspiracy theories featured, that after watching it you would be convinced that the Israelis and George Bush cooked the whole thing up.

Compare those exciting programs with "Dance with the Stars" or even "Lost." Pretty tame stuff, huh. About the only thing on American TV that beats Iranian television is Jack Bauer in 24.

You can imagine what the mullahs would make of Jack - probably see him as a Zionist crusader who deliberately targets and tortures poor innocent Muslims who only want to martyr themselves by blowing up Americans.

Judging by what they think of Harry Potter, that might be an improvement.